Neither is there any creature that is not manifest in his sight: but all things are naked and opened unto the eyes of him with whom we have to do. 

Hebrews 4:13

This week, I've been considering getting some rabbits for meat. Every video I watched regarding the care and raising of rabbits, the most important bit they kept going on and on with is how you must know the gender of your rabbit. Why? Because they breed like rabbits. (Yes, they used that exact joke... a lot. )

So, seeing as I've never personally be able to tell the gender of any animal I google imaged, I watched videos, and repeatedly watched how people confirm the gender of rabbits. I still don't know if I'd be able to 100% accurately declare a gender, as it seems the truly hard part is holding a rabbit on it's back and having it be still long enough for me to figure anything out. But, as a girl, I really connected with, and appreciated that the video presenters - nearly every single one of them - apologized to the rabbit and attempted to sooth the rabbit with gentle words of how they knew this was awkward and how sorry they were to have to look and mess with them in this extremely personal way.

I suppose it was the excess of video I watched on this that made it come to mind as I read the Bible this morning. I was reading in Hebrews and read that verse in chapter 4. "Neither is there any creature that is not manifest in His sight: but all things are naked and opened unto the eyes of Him with whom we have to do."

As I read it a second time, that picture book in my mind opened up precisely to the point where the rabbit breeder pushed down in the appropriate area and the gender organs were protruded enough to make that declaration of gender. They were exposed. Opened.

There's so much in my own life that's private just because we are home bound and don't share life deeply with hardly anyone. There are things that people would know about me only if they spent a lot of time watching me. Things about my character that would be revealed only by watchful, prying eyes, just because they may be traits, flaws or struggles that I'm not too proud of so I wouldn't naturally just open them up to others.

But, to God, all things are naked and opened. He sees me. He knows me. Every ugly, deeply personal, awkward detail. That thought alone is enough to leave me feeling vulnerable and consider "He knows.... how does He love me still? Does He? How could He?"

But just two verses later the author of Hebrews continues... it's like he knew where my mind would go after he used such visceral words as "naked and opened unto the eyes of Him with whom we have to do". 

For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need. Hebrews 4:15,16

I tend to think of infirmities as a sickness. But here, the writer connects the word "infirmities" with "all points tempted".

 "As we are."

Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.

In time of need.

I find a lot of hope in these words. Something desperately needed after I imagined my entire life, both physical and thought life being naked and opened before Him. The very thought of such is enough to make me feel immediately vulnerable and as though surely I should be cast out. 

You read stories about people like Nehemiah (Nehemiah 2) where he was afraid because the king questioned him because of his sad countenance.  A sad countenance. And Nehemiah was afraid to be questioned on it. And yet here I am, standing before the King of Kings with all of me exposed. My frustrations, angry thoughts, all the things I'd failed in accomplishing this week. 

How could the King of all Creation love me anyway?

For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.

Come boldly, that you may have mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

Dear Lord,

I am overwhelmed daily by the tasks of this life, my patience is short, and my tongue is too sharp. I feel daily the sting of failure. I beg your mercy and that you consider my infirmities. Show me mercy, and please, give me grace to help in this overwhelming time of need. I desire to be a vessel that brings honor to You, a joyful fragrance that rises up and blesses You. This Lord, is my time of need as never any other has been. Please help me to do what is right in Your eyes, to walk in wisdom and righteousness each day. May the fruit of your Holy Spirit grow within me to give me patience, and long-suffering love for those around me. Please Lord, break the pieces of my mold that have cracked and are misshapen, and mold me into a vessel of honor unto You. That I may give glory unto my Father and King of all Kings who sees me - every deep part of me - and yet has not cast me away. In the name of Jesus I come humbly,

Amen.