A life without subplots.

In the last year or so I've gotten the opportunity to get to know someone just a little bit. I know most of what I know about her by just watching her, and a little bit more from the few conversations we've had. I'm glad to know her. I'm glad to know people like her exist.

In one rare conversation she mentioned how much she likes the tv show "Greys Anatomy". Armed with that knowledge, I went home and told my TIVO to record the show so I could see what was so great about it.

Initially, something bothered me about the show. I couldn't put my finger on it but it was almost irritating to watch. The problem was that I just couldn't figure out why. So I kept watching. I've seen about four episodes now and finally my problem with the show has hit me.

***Spoiler Warning, if you like the show and haven't seen the Feb. 8th episode you might not want to read on.***



Last night I was watching the latest episode. There'd been a ferry accident and search and rescue were trying to pull bodies out, the doctors from the hospital went to the scene to help out as well. There was blood everywhere. People were trapped under cars bleeding and dying, there were those that had been burned, those with limbs broken, and people with internal and external injuries that without those drs initial aid would have died.
The scene was gruesome.

And the very second two doctors from the same hospital met up with each other in the mess, one of them asked the other if she was upset because she wanted to get married and he hadn't asked her yet.

I actually had to back my mind away from the bloody mess and try and remember what had happened earlier so I could figure out why he was asking her this.
And that's when I figured out what bothers me about the show.

I've seen dozens of shows where the entire show revolves around people and their relationships, their love affairs, their past, their struggles for a job they really want, their fights for promotions and their unrestrained jealousy over way too many things. Those things are superficial. Nearly all of them have been foolish. But I didn't mind them because that's what the show was about.

But seeing the foolish and superficial right next to life and death, next to pain and suffering, next to fear and loss -- I just can't put those together.

I was happy to figure out what bug was niggling at me.

So this morning as I blow dried my hair while singing a song about offering my life as a living sacrifice to God I realized I was living out that very plot myself. And I realized that while I can rest easy knowing the show I'm watching is fake, God doesn't have that assurance about my life.

How many people have slipped into the realms of hell while I wrote this post about why I took issue with Greys Anatomy? How many people have I come in contact with that I could have ministered to and witnessed to that I was too caught up in the petty details of my life to minister to?

I heard a song just recently that made the claim that most people hear about Christ 15 times before coming to Him. It was talking about your place in that line. About how important it is whether you're the 4th mention or the 12th mention because you never know that you're not the 15th. And I wonder how many times I've missed my chance at being 15. Or being the 4th or 8th or whatever number I was on the list.

I guess, for all the things I've said I'm just thinking that I don't want God to change the channel on my life. I don't want Him frustrated by me focusing on the petty things in life. I don't want Him irritated by my lack of urgency in the midst of bloody catastrophe. So I need to daily make sure that if someone reads the story of my life they'll see me focused on the pain and suffering around me, not saving an extra 35 cents by buying the dish soap on double coupon day.

The story of my life
is very plain to read
It starts the day you came
And ends the day you leave
The story of my life
begins and ends with you
The names are still the same
And the storys still the truth

I was alone.
You found me waiting and made me your own
I was afraid
That somehow I never could be a woman that you wanted of me

You're the story of my life,
and every word is true
Each chapter sings your name
Each page begins with you
Its the story of our times
and never letting go
If I die today,
I wanted you to know