A nutty story.

So today at work, after listening to people all down the hallway comment that a squirrel was running around in our ceiling, he finally fell through the foam tiles in the hallway and ran into my office.

The other lady in my office says "Oh, there he is" What??





Next thing I know, I'm trapped in my office with a squirrel. How am I trapped you ask? My office is small to the extent that to turn my chair around, I have to tuck it into the desk. When the squirrel was discovered I was facing the computer, so I backed up to tuck into the desk so I could back up and face the other way so I could exit the office, when I notice that the SQUIRREL, at my FEET under my DESK probably wouldn't appreciate me rolling onto him so I had to wait until he moved somewhere else in my office so I could get out.

(My boss later noted how grateful she was that she didn't have to explain a workers compensation claim of "squirrel attack".)

As bystanders began gathering, someone, somehow convinced people to line the hallways so "someone" could go in and chase the squirrel out and it'd run out the door because there would be people around every other turn so he'd have nowhere else safe to go except the door.


Unfortunately, that didn't happen. The two student workers in the building ended up just scaring the little thing into hiding, but only after it had POOED and PEED on my desk, and floor, and keyboard, and a box on the floor. How special.

So we shut the door, locking him in and waited for maintenance to come and perform what is outlined in their job description as "Other duties as assigned" and get rid of the squirrel.
Meanwhile, I'm standing at the door, listening to a squirrel destroy my office including some mad squirrel dance on my mouse and keyboard pulling up help topics on my computer before my keyboard finally crashed down, scaring him away from the computer, and a little more poo out of him.

Finally "Jimmy" the maintenance king shows up and shuts himself in my office with a 3 ft stick and a resigned air that only comes with age and poor working conditions.

Peeking in through a window in a door that connects another office to mine, I watch as he finally rousts out the squirrel and then corners him behind a filing cabinet. He shoves things around and repeatedly attempts to whackamole. I've never heard, until this day, a squirrel hiss and growl. They do.


Finally, after a 5 minute showdown, he continued whacking at it until it was stunned. There was a moment of silence, he bends down, and the next thing I know he comes up holding the squirrel by the scruff of the neck. I swear, I've never been so impressed with a person in my life.







He walks it out side STUNNED and puts it in the bushes. We watch the groggy squirrel for awhile (ever used that phrase before?) while the King of pest control randomly prods vermin tail, until finally my pooing visitor wakes up enough to scurry off.

I went back to my office/rodent bathroom, and had a fine time attempting to disinfect, which included moving filing cabinets because when a squirrel gets trapped behind a cabinet and a kind looking gentleman is thumping on his little skull, he apparently gets diarrhea.














I can't recall a more interesting day right now.