I am NOT hard of hearing.

I'm not.
I hear plenty. Actually, I hear too much. That's the problem.

I was on the phone today, when two other people entered the room and started whispering to one another. They were trying to be considerate of the fact that I was on the phone
(Duly noted, and appreciated)
But I couldn't hear a word of what the person on the phone said.

Oh I heard them talking.

And I heard the whisperers talking.

But I couldn't hear a single word.

I'm a focused person. If you talk to me, I listen. If for no other reason than that I have a hard time concentrating on anything else while you do. I can't listen to you, and think something else through at the same time. Those are the times that, despite how attentive I looked when I squinted at you thoughtfully, I was really trying to think through some other idea that just came to me.
Those ideas are usually based off your words though - does that make it any palatable?

This seems like a rambling post so far, but I really am going somewhere with this.

God is specific that no man can serve two masters. It's either all God or all Devil. Regardless of what you think.

No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon. Matthew 6:24

For the past couple of years I've struggled with the normal. The typical. The house, the two car garage, the dog, the job, the 401K with medical benefits. It just seems as though my life should be radical. Unusual. Set apart for something foreign to this world.

I just have never figured out how you can have so many things of this world and still have God.
And I realized today that maybe I've been too harsh on Christians in general. Maybe they can hear two conversations and still focus in on what they need to hear. But I was built and designed for focus. To hear one conversation and follow it with all my heart.
Because that's exactly how I live my life.

But maybe my life hasn't turned into all the Fruit that it could simply because I don't distinguish between the two conversations so well. It's harder for me to pick out Gods voice amongst the din of everything else.

So perhaps my spiritual growth is hindered right now only by my ability to shut everything else up?

Is God really calling me to a radical lifestyle?Or am I just hearing too many conversations?
(As a side note I am still growing here. I'm not saying that I'm not. But I want to grow so badly so deeply that I spend a great deal of time searching for weeds in my garden that suck the nutrients out of my ability to produce fruit. I'm still growing. Oh and I'm so very glad.)

***A few moments after posting I realized just how huge a target I made myself for the typical "She hears voices" joke.. Go ahead and make the joke if you want, but now it looks cheap because I just pointed out how obvious the joke was. :) ***