Sunday, April 06, 2014


Reading this morning from Philippians 1 and I hit this verse (27) and I just had to keep reading it over and over.
Only let your conversation be as it becometh the gospel of Christ: that whether I come and see you, or else be absent, I may hear of your affairs, that ye stand fast in one spirit, with one mind striving together for the faith of the gospel;

The words that stuck out to me were "your conversation" and "I may hear of your affairs".

It's fascinating watching the trends on Facebook. But watching my own trends, I see easily that the affairs I choose to tell the world are only my good ones. But if someone else had the responsibility of reporting on me, I wonder what their report would look like.

I don't want to come across as a Christian that has it all together, one that is holy and perfect and obviously doesn't struggle with the same things you struggle with. Yet, rarely will you see the post that shows "Hey, I'm messing it all up today, and I'm choosing to do it because for the moment it seems more fun than bowing my will to God's."

Let me tell you, there's many a minute, hour, day, and upon occasion weeks that go by where it just seems like I just try and shut my eyes to God and hope that I'll pick Him back up again after I'm done doing what I really want to do. Only to find myself at the end looking around at no peace, no joy, fussy kids, anger building up inside me, and frustrated with myself that I've done it again.

The Christian life isn't usually perfect.

But here's the kicker - it could be.

There isn't a single sin or temptation that's going to come your way that you don't have the power of God to overcome, to run away from, to stop in it's tracks. It's almost a given that you will let sin in, but never confuse the fact that you do with the promise that you didn't have to.

Before you were saved? Yes.  You had to.
After you are bought with a price, purchased by the redeeming blood of Jesus Christ? Nope. You have power to overcome.
Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with him, that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin.
For he that is dead is freed from sin.
Romans 6:6,7
WE ARE FREE! These days of frustration and no peace are of our own making - In CHRIST we are free from sin. We are dead, crucified with Christ, that we, from here on, should not serve sin.
Neither yield ye your members as instruments of unrighteousness unto sin: but yield yourselves unto God, as those that are alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness unto God. Romans 6:13

Does a trumpet sound like a piano? NO! Neither should an instrument of righteousness be sounding out unrighteousness! BE what you are! And glory to God, that is free from sin!

 But God be thanked, that ye were the servants of sin, but ye have obeyed from the heart that form of doctrine which was delivered you.
Being then made free from sin, ye became the servants of righteousness.
I speak after the manner of men because of the infirmity of your flesh: for as ye have yielded your members servants to uncleanness and to iniquity unto iniquity; even so now yield your members servants to righteousness unto holiness.
For when ye were the servants of sin, ye were free from righteousness.
What fruit had ye then in those things whereof ye are now ashamed? for the end of those things is death.
But now being made free from sin, and become servants to God, ye have your fruit unto holiness, and the end everlasting life.
For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. Romans 6:17 - end

Oh my goodness!
I praise God that my visa was held back. I praise the God of all wisdom and knowledge and power, that is continuing a work in and through me, that He knew I needed one more blow to pull down some walls of pride.
As this day has progressed I've only become more and more free and happy and joyful. 
You see, before my visa was held back, I've been fighting, hard, trying to get everything done and honestly I had begun getting frustrated with God. It seemed like I couldn't catch a break. Everything just had to be so hard!
But last night I came to a point where I just ground to a halt. I stopped.  And I said "God, there is sin in my camp. Just like the Israelites saw defeat when there was sin in their camp, I think that's what is happening in my camp." and I went on and repented, and very humbly asked God to straighten me back out. And friends, the difference today has seen has been wonderful. 
Where I'd slowly strayed from reading my Bible as I should, in the last day and a half there's been a hunger and desire that had been missing. Oh friends... oh Friends. 
KNOW my Savior. His name is Jesus Christ. He has freed me from sin, brought me back into a good relationship with Him. He IS it.. IT.. whatever your IT is. He's what you need. He'll change you.
And face it, you know you want to change. You know things have happened in your life you didn't like. You know you've walked paths you shouldn't have. You know, deep in your heart, that even in your happiest days, the happiness just wasn't quiiiite complete.
He's it. He will free you from sin, and bring you into HIS family, as His son, His daughter. He bore your sin on Calvary, It's finished. Repent and be saved. SAVED. Let my Jesus show you just how lost you are on your own path. He is mighty, willing, ready, and more than able to save.

Are you a Christian? Will you share your testimony here of how God saved you?
Are you not a Christian? Or do you believe you are a Christian but don't seem to know the joy or peace that I'm expressing here? Would you like to know more about this wonderful God I serve? Will you contact me? Please?

Saturday, April 05, 2014

I remember when my van rolled away.

But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering, for he that wavers is like a wave of the sea, driven with the wind and tossed. James 1:6

Based off the old hymn "I remember when my burdens rolled away"
I remember when my van rolled away.
I had driven it a year, night and day.
Then I sought the blessed Lord,
And I took Him at His word
And now my old van has rolled away.

I had to remind myself of that verse today. I was cleaning my car, vacuuming it, pulling out all the random food bits the kids had knocked under seats, the stray pen, that toothpick that rolled under the drivers gas pedal, all that fun stuff. I was cleaning it because later this afternoon someone was coming to take it. They were taking my vehicle.

As of now, I no longer own a car.

I don't know about you, but that idea is pretty big to me. I got a great deal on this car. It was a great car. It was a minivan. And now I'm selling it all in the name of going to India. You didn't see it, but even in that last sentence I had to stop my fingers from writing "in the hope of going to India".

But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering, for he that wavers is like a wave of the sea, driven with the wind and tossed.

As I cleaned it, I felt the ping, that nudge saying "you don't have a visa yet, what if they ..."

But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering, for he that wavers is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.

Sometimes you honestly just have to stop thoughts, dead in their tracks.

Which is what I had to do this afternoon.

Even as I type this, there are a ton of doubts and worries that want to come up. But the easiest way to silence them is to consider what I actually know.

I know, beyond a doubt, that God made clear that India was next.
I know, beyond a doubt, that God gave us our specific destination in India (Atmakur).
I know, beyond a doubt, that God gave us our contact in India (John Pradeep)
I've given up everything to follow that calling. I can trust that God can see through His part. God isn't stymied by Indian Visa Consulates.

Some days this journey feels so unbelievable that it can't be real. It's really hard sometimes. But God has helped. He's made it possible for us to still be on the schedule we believe He put us on. We believe our departure date is His departure date.

The bulk of my stuff is sold, I have no job, I have no car, What I do have are two beautiful daughters, passports and God's directions. My God is able to do the rest.

And that said... I'm a bit more excited now that my van just drove away.
Nothing wavering.
25 days to India.