Tuesday, December 26, 2006

I do not understand

I was thanked the other day.

I'd done a small thing, not even by myself, but simply helped someone to do something and was later thanked. When I remarked that what I'd done was so very small, they indicated I was being thanked for something else entirely and believed I knew what they were talking about. By the time I got back to my car I realized that I really didn't know what they were talking about. My contributions to anything this person would notice are so small they are almost inconsequential. So if I'm not being thanked for that, what am I being thanked for?

And that started a whole list of things.

As I was trying to understand someones very sincere gratitude, I realized there are so many things that I don't understand.

I don't understand how people can sit down during a worship service.

I don't understand why one of our church ladies persists in kissing my neck rather than my cheek. I've seriously wondered if one day I will have to explain why I have lipstick on my neck.

I don't understand how every person in the world is not wholly addicted to Sonic's lemon berry slush.

I don't understand how I got so blinded by doing the "best" thing that I did it anyway despite making someone feel badly.

I don't understand how supposed Christians can not desire God.

Unfortunately, I've also never understood which blinker I should use if I'm merging right but turning left.

Life's full of things I might never understand.
But for once, at least today, I'm happy to be oblivious. I don't have to understand completely.

It's just enough to know that people are sincerely glad to have me around. That even though they sit for a worship service they're still moved enough to stand every once in a while. I'm grateful for the warm hug that just happens to come with an uncomfortable kiss.

I'm also happily grateful for the small pleasures in life that make you literally stop and thank God for taste buds. I'm grateful that I can have confidence in people that even though I'm taking better care of a tray of meat than a friendship, that my friend is still my friend. And I'm grateful that God still moves in the hearts of those that are His own. And nothing can make you desire God more than just a taste of Him.

And my insurance company is grateful, that regardless of which blinker I turn on, I've nearly always gotten to where I'm going safely. :)

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