Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Watch your language!

"I'm ugly"
"I'm fat"
"I'm stupid"
"I'm not good enough"
"I'm worthless"
"What's the point?"
"I don't care"
"It doesn't matter anyway"
"You're mean"
"You're an idiot"
"You're lazy"
"You're a slob"
"He's two fries short of a happy meal"
"He's dumber than an ox"
"Nobody likes him"
"He's worse than the other one"
"We'll never make it"
"It'll be too late anyway"
"I'll never find it"
"I'll never beat this"
"I hate doing this (chore/work/task)"

Do you feel inspired yet?
Here is one thing I know - I've never regretted hoping for something. I've never regretted saying a kind word. I've never regretted encouraging someone.

Here's a second thing I know - I've made a difference in lives hoping for something. I've made people happier by saying a kind word. I've inspired someone to do better by encouraging them.

So, please, I beg you, start using different words. You tear down not just others but yourself - you're so much better than this. Your words matter so much, and make more of a difference than you know! You have power that you aren't even aware of, and if you use it unwisely or carelessly because you just don't place a value on your words - people get hurt, discouraged, sad, angry, bitter.

Your words matter.

I know it's strange to say encouraging things sometimes - it literally puts a halt to a conversation because sometimes encouragement just doesn't fit in - but it's always necessary. Some people out there, myself included quite often, are just plain tired and a simple word of encouragement a simple word of praise makes a world of difference.

The Bible says so much about how strong our tongues are, and I believe if you go anywhere today you'll see living proof of it. Husbands gripe at wives rarely stopping to say "I appreciate what a great cook you are." Wives gripe at husbands rarely stopping to say "I appreciate how you work hard to fix things around here." Children gripe at parents and fail to say "Thank you, for all the things you do, from laundry, to meals or the new movie you bought me." And parents gripe at their kids for failures, without recognizing their traits and talents that could change their failures into successes."
And as part of the results of that you watch divorces happen and kids rebelling against their parents.

And friends fail to tell friends how much they enjoy eating lunch with them every day.

We gripe and complain, which just discourages and frustrates.

But I guarantee you, when you start encouraging people - find anything good to say! - then you will make a difference that you wouldn't believe. Things will change that no amount of complaining would have changed.

So throw out those lines you use on others AND YOURSELF - and begin using a new language.
You'll discover something amazing.


Kristi said...

During my Beth Moore study of Daniel (excellent by the way), she was talking about worshipping idols...things you place at the top of your attention list that takes away from God. How "image building is the attempt to make impressions that are bigger than we are" Anyway, then she made a statement in the section of the chapter 'another side of self absorbption' that has really changed my way of thinking.


She used examples like:
i am ugly and there is none as ugly as me.
i am stupid, and there is none as stupid as me...

I know this is a little different than the point you were trying to make, but I think it still all ties in. We don't realize how just one simple negative statement really affects us. What, they say it takes like 27 positives to overcome one negative or something like that? I have really tried to be more aware of what I am saying for both reasons pointed out. My personal thinking of myself and to continue to have healthy postitve realtionships with others. It's so easy for the devil to use something so little to wedge his way in.
Thanks for the reminder today, it's an easy lesson to forget! :)

flyawaynet said...

Great comment Kristi,
When we are so absorbed with self-image, every thing that people say or ask or do we typically interpret it through that self-image.

When in reality, people tend to talk about THEMSELVES, and when they're telling you about a struggle, problem, opinion, they're not necessarily talking about anything to do with you.

"You're so vain, you probably think this song is about you." comes to mind. :)

Thank you for sharing Beth's, and your thoughts!

Anonymous said...

if we spoke to our friends the way we speak to ourselves, how long would they remain our friends?

ever notice that it's easier to accept a criticism than a compliment? we tend to downplay nice words about ourselves. do we think we're displaying too much pride if we accept the compliment? i don't know. but i do know that learning to simply say thank you and let it go is incredibly hard.

it might be the thinking constantly of ourselves thing.

and if it takes 27 good thinks (yes, thinks, not things!) to wipe out a bad one, and we have something like 50,000 thoughts in a day, and we think constantly of ourselves, and we are thinking mean things, how many good thinks do we need to have to erase even a single year?

oddly, it usually only takes a single bad thought to wipe out 50,000 good ones.

and even worse, if i think these things about myself, what image of Christ do i present to the world?