I'm one of those people that tends to think they're unique. My feelings are unique, my hurts are unique, my thoughts are unique, my fears are unique.
I'm sure you're not like that. I'm sure I'm the only one that feels that way.
Or perhaps every single one of you feels that same way.
But I wonder if it's not true where God is concerned. Each of us have our own unique relationship with Him. We relate in different ways, struggle with different things, and all of us just respond to life, and God, differently.
Last week I struggled to rebound after the sudden jolt I had from a happy and fun time, to the stark reminder of the reality of my moms disease and my dads decisions. Suddenly I became quiet. I was quiet because sometimes when I talked I started crying again even if the subject was as inconsequential as dinner rolls. So I spent a few days trying not to think, talk, and especially not cry.
On Sunday morning I stayed home from church and in an empty house I began doing dishes. And it made me cry again. And I finally said what I needed to say to God. I didn't know what to say until that very moment, but suddenly it just flowed out and I spoke and I cried. It hurt.
I recognize, that you don't know me. The crazy influx of readers that have begun stopping by my blog.... some of you are old friends, but most of you are strangers. So keep reading and I'll get to the part that is about you eh?
Sunday morning, I told God I needed something that was simply an impossible request for me, and even as I asked it I knew it was impossible.
And then, as my family was about to return home I left and spent the day around town just passing time. And all day long I absolutely, positively, felt His comforting presence.
So while I didn't know what I was praying for, what I needed, I received exactly that. God could have sent a person along, but my comfort doesn't come from people. It doesn't come from physical actions or words... oh sure, those things are comforting, but nothing like the comfort that God can bring.
It's too easy for us to look for worldly comfort, physical comfort, things of this world to comfort you. But God truly wants us to find our comfort in Him. And when we ask Him for that comfort, I believe He will come through.
I didn't wax eloquent with my words, I didn't say "Lord," or solemnly close with "In Jesus name, Amen".
I just cried out.
And He heard my cry.
He WILL do the same for you. He will see you through the dark nights when the money isn't there, the test results aren't good, and when the boss announces that there are layoffs coming. All you have to do is open your mouth and say the words in your heart. He can hear you even when you whisper.