I've found a blogger that I have really been enjoying lately. He's had a whole - and quite long - series on faith going on for awhile now, but all the posts are in small bite sized chunks that I can easily take in without feeling over-saturated. His name is Richard Bentall and his blog is "For Such A Time As This".
The most riveting post was added today and in it he absolutely nailed me. He says:
Many Christians are waiting for God to move in their life, to make some dramatic change, to open doors to greater power and ministry while they lounge in front of the TV for countless hours each week. It is an appalling thing to watch Christians who have been filling their minds with worldly filth during the week crowding the altars on Sunday asking God for more power.
And I wondered if this Mr. Bentall guy lives next door to me or something.
But I've noticed something lately that actually makes my laziness in the issue even worse. I'm no longer watching tv out of desire, but out of habit. When I heard my favorite show was ending next week, I mentally said, "eh". When I accidentally saw the results on American Idol last night before I could tell TIVO to start my recording of it, again I just didn't care. The clincher? I watched the show anyway out of habit.
So much of what I watch lately is fluff, simple filler in my life that stands as an excuse to not do other things. When I desired to watch tv, that was one thing. But lacking the desire and doing it anyway, somehow that sin seems worse.
I asked though, for more of God and while He's given me some more of His presence, and spirit, what He's given me the most of is the ability to get more. By taking away the desire for some of the worldly things I pursue, He's opened up more possible times for me to pursue Him. I've spent the last two weeks almost a model of moderation. And I never asked for that. Things are changing.
This week I found a McDonalds employee that apparently wasn't concerned about window times and as I pulled up to the window he automatically looked for any cars behind me. He then actually seemed to commiserate with me that I couldn't pay for anyone elses meal that morning. Then he popped the magic question, "Why do you do that?" and this time I didn't fail in answering. It probably doesn't mean much to anyone else, but the fact that I witnessed to a McDonalds employee this week... practically screams that things are changing.
I'm so glad I serve a God that not only allows me to change, but instigates it, and enables me to. For all my asking for more of God, it all began with Him saying "You need more of Me".
What a God I serve.