Saturday, April 18, 2009

Day 34 - Faith to be exactly who you are.

Yesterday I hummed "Nearer my God to Thee" followed by "I'm movin' on" ( a song by Rascal Flatts) and finished up with several verses of "America the Beautiful". I'm a jukebox gone seriously wrong.
At work I've been called "Pollyanna", only slightly less than I've been affectionately called "Freak/Weirdo".
I'm not the least bit afraid to make you angry with me, but I'll only do it if I really feel I need to because I hate it more than anything else.
My idea of "need to times" are drastically different from my victims.
I rarely pray at the altar at church because I've got a deep seeded fear of praying in public like the Pharisees did.
I'm quick (often too quick) to jump on whatever bandwagon is exciting or challenging, or just plain interesting to me.
I love children to an impossible level.
I'm too strict.
I expect too much from people.
I set impossibly high standards for people to reach, and am always bitterly disappointed when they don't make it.
I have an annoying habit of not saying anything when I don't have anything to say. Anyone up for an awkward silence?
I have an annoying habit of talking when there's just no need for it.
I get frustrated too easily.
I twist the truth into lies to get out telling things I don't want to.
I could be a professional liar. (Sometimes I actually have to stop and think, to keep from lying.)
I'm pushy.
I laugh with people even when I don't think they're funny, because I don't want them to feel awkward.
I sometimes think later that the person should have felt awkward after what they said, and that I should not have tried to ease the moment.
I feel overwhelmingly responsible for people.
I procrastinate like all get out. (My laundry has been hanging on a line in my living room for 3 days now. I'm pretty sure it's dry by now.)
I buy things I don't like, just to annoy myself sometimes (Otherwise life is boring sometimes with little variety).
I'm crazy about God.
I sing... a lot.
And no, I don't sing well.
I'm passionate about justice.
I've been a miserable human being and I'm thankful that Jesus is equally passionate about mercy.

I'm a flawed, and certainly quirky individual. But by faith, I believe that all my quirks and struggles and obnoxious traits amount to something that God is interested in. Something that God had a hand in creating. Something that God is still in the development phases of. And while I could hide my flaws or be too embarrassed to state them (I'm pretty sure I haven't dug too deep into the flaw bank for this post) I'd rather be brave enough to be the first to tell you about them.

Because if God can love ME... seriously, you have no idea the stupidity I've put Him through... but if He can love me despite all this - He can love you. So take a good look at me. I'm growing in faith to be exactly what God made me. I'm still flawed. But I'm happy to be loved in Him, flaws and all. Even if you're ready to smother me with a pillow.

Be exactly who you are and look to God there. You'll find Him. Look beyond all the stupid quirks and look for the greatness of God in someone. You'll find it.



Who are you?

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