It's the difference between standing next to your father and having him hold your hand, and having him grab your hands and spin you round and round with your feet dangling high off the ground.
I've been defrosting our little fridge here at the office. The job was done and I was on my knees with a rag sopping up all the water that had somehow escaped the odd jumble of containers I'd assembled to catch it all. And on my knees in this quiet little moment I found myself talking to God and asking Him to amaze me. Once I was done I reached my wet dripping hand in between the narrow space between the fridge and the water cooler so I could grab the power strip and turn it back on.
I turned it back on, and realized about that same time that grabbing electrical stuff with literally dripping wet hands, was probably not the safest idea in the world. The words "Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God." come to mind now.. and I wonder if He was tempted to give me an immediate and shocking answer that would have indeed left me jolted and amazed. If He was tempted He over came it, and for that I am most definitely grateful.
But the whole prayer connects me right back to the same thing I've been yanking on for quite awhile. I want to see God move. I want the powerful God that can do all things to do something extraordinary. I don't need to see signs and wonders to believe, I believe already, and that's why I want to see signs and wonders. He can part the seas, bring the dead to life, He can have the terrorists in this world suddenly and massively confused so that they begin killing themselves and end the war.
He can make a donkey talk, the sun to literally stop moving in the sky, He can split the world into continents, He can create or destroy life with just a thought, and can make an entire world with galaxies more than 7 light years away -- in only 7 days.
I think He can handle our needs.
But, so often it feels like He's like a Mozart that only plays chopsticks, or a Da Vinci that only draws stick figures. What He does, daily, pales to transparency compared to what He could do. And I don't want to live like that. I most certainly don't want to be the reason I'm living like this. If it's Gods choice, ok. But if it's because I don't have enough faith, strength, or maturity then I don't accept that at all. Teach me, strengthen me, grow me into maturity so that I can be everything that I've been created to be.
It's been the constant cadence for weeks, 'I want more." Lord willing it will be a constant cadence of my heart for eternity.