He's being painfully kind.
He's spoken in unique ways all day long, He's sent scriptures, sent me to my own posts Trust Me and Surprise Me, God? He told me to ask of Him, something I've refused to do this last week. So I asked, in rude "prove yourself" kind of way, for the thing I thought least likely. Two hours ago I received it.
His vast promises leave me looking at my life in disappointment feeling as shabby as a child covered in dirt and stains, while He promises beauty and wonder. It doesn't fit what I know of me. But at the same time, I still resist the close fellowship I desperately crave, especially now that I feel Him again. I never want to go through this week again.
He's asked me to walk on despite the fear, told me to accept and trust. And I guess that's where it just sits now.