At church Sunday night in an impromptu business meeting I received more information on my church's financial status. Our pastor was required to complete an end of the year report, and in the year we have prospered. We're not rich, not even really abundant, but for a small church of approximately 40 or 50, every need has been supplied.
And while I'm pleased that we're doing well financially, and I'm glad to know it. I wondered if another report is available.
How many souls have we we won? How many have been baptized? How many received the Holy Spirit this year?
... almost as quickly as those thoughts came to me, I realized thinking about my churches spiritual numbers is just another distraction from me focusing on my own.
How many people did I witness to in 2008? How many accepted Christ as a result? How many seeds did I plant, and water? How many people have I prayed with and encouraged to seek the Holy Spirit?
I focus on so many things, and I tend to use words like "We" or "Christians" but in truth, I need to passionately focus my attention to the one thing that I am required to account for.
So, when you read my posts for this new year of 2009, listen closely to this one thing. I'm not lecturing you. I'm not lecturing the world around me.
I'm lecturing me.
I want better. I want best. I want my actions to display my heart. I want my words to display my depth rather than shallow surface words that dull the sharp pierce of the gospel of truth.
And I want my words to apply to me. Not you. Me. So brace yourself and if you see me go awry, please comment strongly.
I want to grow. I want God. I want more. I want most.