Sunday, August 17, 2008

Don't leave me.

My beautiful Bell. I'll have had her 5 weeks tomorrow. And she's been absolutely fantastic. Once we got past the first week of awful - life could not have been more pleasant with my new beautiful, fearless, helpful, and super smart babe.

Then yesterday, we were going to go out to eat with someone so I moved her car seat from my car to the other persons car.
It seriously, seriously, freaked her out. She screamed and cried, and gave me that look that I just can't describe for you. I told her specifically what was going to happen.
"We're going to put the car seat in here so you can ride, then we'll go eat lunch, and then we'll come back home, to here, and you can go take a nap in your bed."
I buckled her, screaming, into the car continuously telling her what exactly was happening and that everything was ok.
I walked around the car and climbed in and sat down.
Instantly the crying stopped.
She took one of those pitiful shuddering breaths and held her hand out to me. With a sober and tear-stained face, she watched me and held my hand.

Remembering her intense fear at what she deemed was going to be a change, still grips my heart. But in there, also, I saw a lesson.

Whatever happens God, where ever I go, who ever I go there with, don't leave me or I will fall to pieces too.

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