This walk.

This, is my walk.

It's filled with a lot of victory, some change, and a lot of struggles. This entire blog is evidence of my walk. Whatever the state my my walk, my blog is evidence.
And so this morning, I'm sitting down to the difficult task to tell you of my walk.

Last Monday I reached out for God and I found Him. He was back in a powerful way, more powerful than usual. I felt Him. My entire demeanor changed the moment I felt His presence. Holding onto the hand of my Protector and Provider, I boldly, probably arrogantly, began shaking my fist at the devil.
Tuesday morning I believe the devil smirked, and tapped me on the shoulder. He then elegantly drove his wrecking ball into my life.
He told me the problems from my past would be problems in my future as well. And he brought forth evidences to prove it.
He told me who I was, was intrinsically bad, and brought forth evidences to prove it.
He told me no good thing would last. And brought forth evidences to prove that.
He told me I would never know peace, love, or pure friendship. And stomped his evidence of that into my heart.

His lies were as constant and overpowering as the flood waters that recently wrecked the homes in my city. I struggled to keep my head above water.

Are you discouraged yet? I sure am.
But... BUT but BUT but BUT.

Here's what I know. Maybe I don't feel it yet, that's ok. Here's what I know.

God, who I trust, called the devil the "Father of lies". God, who I trust, said the "truth is not in Him {the devil}". That means, what the devil said, isn't the truth. Period.
That means the devil is lying to me. Period.

I don't have to feel good. I don't have to feel happy. I don't have to feel peaceful. I just have to trust God. The devil might steal from me. Maybe I won't win this battle. But this I know.

I'm not a fair weather Christian anymore. I have grabbed onto the truth like a bulldog and no matter what, my teeth are sunk in and I'm not letting go. He is my shelter, my provider, my comforter, my keeper, my calm, my peace, my patience, my joy, my rock. And I will not leave His side. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death.
He is with me.
In the presence of my enemies.
He is with me.
In the darkness of the storm.
He is with me.

I am not alone. Because He told me I wouldn't be alone.

And at some point, you just have to put your foot down and say that old quote: "God said it, I believe it, and that settles it."

It's not about how you feel. It's not about how the situation looks. It's not about what your past looks like. It's not about what you're afraid will happen. It's about what God said. Period.

It is a narrow path though.

My pastor in his sermon yesterday mentioned how runway lights seem to narrow the farther down to the end you look. And he was comparing it to the road we're on and how that's only an optical illusion and it's actually just as wide at the end as it is at the start of the lights. I got his point, and it fit his sermon, but personally, I want the lights to narrow. Those runways seems small from a distance, but if I'm walking down that runway, I've got a lot of room to scootch from the left to the right, and I could wear myself out zigzagging across the way.

I want my path to narrow the farther along I go. I want my focus to be zeroed in on my target, my goal, my aim, my highest joy. I want the things, even the good things, that distract me on this runway, to be excluded the farther along I go. Until when I reach the end, and there is only room for me and Him.

I'm going through. Not because I'm special. Not because I've done something amazing. Not because I'm stronger or more spiritual. Because if anything, I've no doubt that I'm weaker and less spiritual than most of my readers now. But I'm going through simply because I'm convinced. He's convinced me. And I won't move from that.



Lord, I have started to walk in the light
That shines on my pathway so clearly, so bright;
I’ve bade the world and its follies adieu,
And now with my Savior I mean to go through.

Refrain:
I’m going through, I’m going through,
I’ll pay the price, whatever others do;
I’ll take the way with the Lord’s despised few;
I’m going through, Jesus, I’m going through.

Many once started to run in this race,
But with our Redeemer they could not keep pace;
Others accepted because it was new,
But not very many seem bound to go through.

Let me but follow my Lord all alone,
And have for my pillow, like Jacob, a stone,
Rather than vain worldly pleasures pursue,
Than turn from this pathway and fail to go through.

Come then, my comrades, and walk in this way
That leads to the kingdom of unending day;
Turn from your idols and join with the few,
Start in with your Savior, and keep going through.